Life is a great teacher

Life is a great teacher.  Life continues to teach through the various experiences as we grow.  From early childhood till we depart from this world, there are some lessons that naturally come into our lives and if they are not learnt well, the class is repeated.  Like in school, where one has to learn a particular syllabus and if it is not learnt properly, one is specially coached and if one still doesn't do well then one has to repeat the year. Similarly in life, lessons that are not learnt well are repeated again and again.  This is evolution or natural growth.

       The human body consists of 60 trillion cells and each cell has knowledge of the entire body.  Every moment many cells die and new ones are born.  Once a cell dies all its information is transferred to the new one.  Even at this moment, our cells are dying and new ones are taking birth.  After every seven years the entire body renews itself.  The body we had seven years ago is no longer the one we have at present.  Every seven years there is complete overhaul and the body is as though reborn.  A similar thing happens to our minds.  If we observe our lives carefully, we will find a transformation taking place roughly every seven years, give and take a few years.  We notice a definite paradigm shift taking place in the personality.  These are lessons that Life teaches us.  We can either go with the flow and learn them effortlessly and naturally or learn them in a more proactive, conscious sort of way.

Lesson one - 'I', 'me' and 'mine'

       The first lesson begins from the time of birth itself.  From a state of being a 'nobody' (where our past lives are neither remembered nor known), from the primordial egg we hatch to take birth.  Birth takes place in much the same way that noise emerges from silence and the number one comes after zero.  Then miraculously we experience the sense of 'I', a strange experience of being.  At birth, the first lesson is to become aware of the mystery of this 'I'.  This experience of 'I' begins from our early childhood and continues till the end.  Till age seven the child thinks that everything revolves around it.  It is the centre of attraction. Children feel important knowing the world serenades to their tune.

       The lesson here is to understand the significance of one's own being.  It is a great mystery and there is tremendous joy in self discovery.  The child first becomes aware of its body, then its personality.  It starts understanding how to walk, talk, climb, jump and dance.  It exults in self-discovery.  "I can walk!  I can sing! I can dance!  Look at me".

       The twin concepts of 'I' (aham) and 'my' (mama) becomes apparent.  "This is my mother and my father.  These are my toys, and this is my house, my cat!"  We discover our sense of being.  We believe we are the most important people in the world and imagine that the immediate world is meant for our enjoyment. Though we experience the presence of others, we assume they cater to us only.  Either they belong to us or we don't notice them.  Everything known to us belongs to us.  We know nothing about anything else.  "Whatever doesn't belong to me like my neighbours or what lies at the periphery of my world means nothing to me."  In this way everything rotates around the sense of "I."

Lesson Two - "You" and "yours"

       After the age of seven we discover the presence of others around us.  We become aware of our siblings and the other children at school.  We come to realise that these 'others' also have their own identities.  We recognize that our parents and siblings, though belonging to us, have their own identities.  We learn that some of our toys are also shared by our siblings.  In other words, we learn to cognize and accept the presence of others in our lives.  Some people, however, don't learn this important lesson thus remaining egoistic and selfish all their lives.

       From birth to seven are the selfish years.  Thereafter, we learn of the existence of others.  We recognize that other beings exist.  Also, we come to understand that certain things belong to them too. These are the years where friendships are developed with girls and boys.  The gender difference has not yet entered into our awareness.  Just as the concepts of "I" and "my" were present, now 'you' and 'yours' become apparent.  'Aham' and 'mama' is the first lesson and 'tvam' and 'tva' is the second one.

       Saint Tulsidas says in Ramacharitra Manas "mai aru mor tor tain maya" this is the beginning of maya.  Animals understand this lesson and depict it through their territorial instincts.  Even youngsters exhibit this trait of possessiveness towards their belongings.  They say, "This is my room".  "This is my dress, or toy or poster"!  Parents further encourage this behaviour by making them aware that certain objects belong to them and others to their sibling.  This lesson is relevant at this stage of life.  Later, it helps in accepting the presence of other beings.  It is best learnt during one's childhood years at school from seven to fourteen years.

Lesson three - Gender and personality awareness

       Lesson three beings at fourteen.  This is when we discover the gender and personalities of others.  From fourteen to twenty one years, there is an exploration of the other species, one from Mars (men) the other from Venus (women).  There is an attraction towards and an attention to the opposite gender.  Boys discover the presence of girls and their thoughts are riveted in that direction.  Girls, though being aware of their own personality and identity, are also aware of boys.

      Even Adi Sankaracarya says, "balastatvat, kridasaktaha, tarunastavat tarunisaktaha".  As long as we are children we are happily playing with other children.  But as adolescents, we become aware of the opposite gender.  During these teenage years children live in a dream world.  Their parents often do not understand them, occasionally giving rise to unnecessary rifts and discord.  Here, the lesson of accepting the other gender is learnt.  Those who fail to learn this do not respect or value their spouses.  As a result, they face problems in their married lives.  It is important to understand and accept the differences and specialties of the opposite gender.  This empowers them to revere and regard the other.

Lesson four - Family growth and acquisition "Us" and "ours"

       Familiarity with the opposite gender brings a feeling of possessiveness   Between the age of twenty one to twenty eight one gets married and experiences a sense of belonging to another.  In the beginning, we know we exist and have a host of possessions that include other people.  Now the reverse happens.  We realize that we could also be a possession of another.  'Somebody else belongs to me' and 'I also belong to someone' and 'something belongs to us' are the threads of the husband-wife-children relationship that bind the family together.  There is an experience of oneness with another being which is wonderful experience in itself.  Later this guides and aids in the realization of the Ultimate Truth.

       These years are spent in profession or job enhancement, house building and rearing of children.  We learn the invaluable  lesson of somebody belonging to us.  'This is my wife, my husband, my children.' This lesson, if  felt and deeply understood, enables one identify with the world in a more humane manner. We are able to understand the value of other families, other peoples' wealth and properties.  We begin to see things from another perspective.  This applies not only to human beings. Appreciation of the lives of animals and birds also permeates our understanding.  We realize that just as we have families, so do animals and birds and others in their natural kingdom.  We become sensitive to the presence of other beings.  This fourth stage spans the years when people are beginning their careers, seeking stability in their jobs, getting married, nurturing desires to build a house, buy a car and get their children into the best schools.  The emphasis is on us, our families consisting of spouses, children, grand parents, relatives, education of children, house and other personal assets and possessions.

Lesson five - Exploration and travel 'They and theirs'

       Lessons learnt have to be transcended.  Once a child passes the fifth grade, it has to progress to the next class.  It cannot say, "No, no I want to stay on here.  I like my teacher very much!"  In much the same way, keeping in mind the lessons learned we too must move to the next level of learning.

       So far we have learned the lessons of 'I' and 'my', 'you' and 'yours', of us and 'ours'.  From twenty eight to thirty five, people explore the world.  They want to know what the world is all about. Interest in things pertaining to society, the nation and other countries develops.  This is the time of travel and exploration.  One travels within one's own country learning about its diversity as well as to other countries, learning about their cultures and traditions too.

Lesson Five is recognizing/realizing that families other than "mine" also exist in this world.

       This is the stage of an explorer and an adventurer out on an exploration trip!  At a physical level, this is actually going out and visiting places and meeting new people.  At a mental level, it is reading books and expanding one's horizons of knowledge.  Such people are no longer bound to their families.  They do not remain mere householders in the sense of holding on to their households. They move out into society and the world at large.  At this stage we realize the existence of 'they' and 'theirs'.  We understand that there are others in this world and some things belong to them.

Lesson Six - Universal identification of love "We" and "ours"

       This lesson spans the years thirty five to forty two.  Here we come to realize the vastness of the world.  Not only do we acknowledge the presence of others in this world but we also come to identify with the vast variety of life forms that exist on the planet.  A feeling that we all belong to Mother Earth arises.  The lesson being of 'we' and 'ours', there is the feeling of togetherness that we all belong to earth and the earth belongs to us.  This is the stage of identification with the entire creation, of universal love and compassion.  'We' denotes all beings, human, bird and animal and 'ours' denotes the universe.  At this level a person becomes a lover of the world.  It is a state of unconditional love for and towards all.  One learns the lesson of Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam"  - seeing the whole world as One large family.

Lesson Seven - Contemplation and mysticism "All is That"

      As we proceed from forty two onwards, questions arise in our minds about 'we' and 'ours'.  "Is there more to life than just us and what we have?"  People become introspective and wonder whether there is more to existence than meets the eye.  Until now, we had the feeling of being in control of our lives, but as we progress in years we encounter old age, death and an inability to control events. We begin to question the possibility of something else being in control of our lives.  "Who are we" Are we alone in this world?"  We are not what we seem to be and the world is not what it appears to be.  Such persons between the ages of forty two to forty nine, perhaps for the first time in their lives, come to accept the presence of God.  They become conscious of the presence of a spiritual power, a Reality or Divinity that lies beyond the domain of scientific analysis.  This is the commencement of our spiritual journey.  We come to sincerely accept and recognize the power of a Reality that is beyond the realm of the senses and emotional and intellectual perceptions.  This opens the path of mysticism and the person becomes a mystic.  Prior to this, such people could have been religious and ritualistic performing rituals for their own or their family's well being.

       A higher level of spiritual growth implies a deep and subtle understanding that the world really belongs to 'That'.  There is a supreme power, call it God or Truth or 'That' and everything belongs to that power.  We learn the lesson of 'That' factor or Tat.  During these years we become more aware of this factor.  We realize that we are not what we imagined ourselves to be and the world is not what we thought it was.  We have reached lesson seven which is mystical number.  There is a strange mystery to everything.

       Number one pertains to something new.  Number two is the awareness of someone else, three is awareness of the other gender, four is building the four walls of your house, five is the exploration of newer worlds, six is the number of unconditional love and seven is the number of mysticism.

Lesson eight - Dispassion and vairagya 

       Number eight is the lesson of vairagya i.e. dispassion or Saturn.  When we come to appreciate that everything belongs to that power called God, we become more detached from external stimuli.  The notion of things belonging to us seems childish/immature and ridiculous.  (If we were so, then we should be able to carry all that we possess with us after we die!).  The false notions of 'I' and 'my' are dropped.  We realize that everything belongs to that Supreme Reality and that It alone expresses as this world.  All that is seen changes and that Reality alone is the changeless substratum.  We become detached from all that changes.  We gain total vairagya or dispassion from all that is asat or unreal.  From forty nine to fifty six is the age of Sanyas. 

Lesson Nine - Self Realization and Enlightenment

       Between the ages of fifty six to sixty three, when we are firmly established in vairagya we come to realize and recognize that the one I considered God is not different from my real Self.  He is I, 'Soham'.  This is the time of Self Realization or Enlightenment.  We understand that the God whom we were seeking everywhere is in fact 'my own Self'.  In these seven years, through vairagya and intense contemplation we become aware of the fact that we are neither the body, nor the mind nor intellect, but we are the one Indivisible Supreme Reality - Chidanandarupha Sivoham Sivoham.  

Lesson Ten - Teaching and sharing the lessons learned

       We must now share what we have learned with others. After the age of sixty three, we become Enlightened teachers.  We now tell others, "You are That" (Tat Tvam Asi).  A Guru is one who tells others, "You are that Divinity".  From sixty three onwards we learn to share with others the lesson that we have learned.  This lesson of sharing with all continues till the very end.

       All these lessons must be learnt within our lifetime.  Nature continues teaching us without being concerned about our age.  People often get stuck on lesson one itself.  They may be grown up individuals but behave like children!.  They learn the lesson of selfishness and live in a world of their own.  They are not aware of the presence of other beings.  Even while living with the family they remain oblivious to others and derive their identify from self importance.  When we learn the lesson of accepting others, we begin respecting and valuing things from a universal perspective.  We do litter roads and public places because we understand that these belong to all.

       The motto, Live and let live'  becomes important.  With lesson three, we respect the emotions and differences that exist between genders.  Respect for the uniqueness of each comes to the fore and there is no encroachment on the other's feelings and rights.  There is no suppression of the spouse's individuality.  There is recognition of the partner's right to independent growth and for his or her own independent understanding of life.

       Lesson four enables us to bond with the family unit, of growing together with love and regard for one another.  Many do not go beyond this lesson. They limit themselves to their families and remain unaware of the world outside.

       Lesson five pertains to developing an awareness of the presence of  other living beings, animals, birds, plants, continents as well as world issues of global warming, ecology, environmental and social problems. Here one has to expand one's vision and develop an understanding of not only the world but the entire cosmos.  With a heightened sense of awareness and expanded vision comes a sense of identification that 'we are all one.'

       Lesson six is of 'we' and 'ours', of compassion and universal love.  Contemplation reveals the mystic presence of Divinity when we go beyond the world of mere sensory perceptions. Spirituality and mysticism are components of lesson seven.  Dispassion or vairaga is lesson eight. When this lesson is well learnt we experience the Self.  With renunciation of concepts of 'I' and 'my' we come to recognize the Divinity within and become enlightened.  Thereafter, for the rest of our lives we live as enlightened teachers, imparting the Knowledge and Experience to humanity.

       This is the syllabi of human existence.  If we learn these in one lifetime, we attain liberation.  If we fail to learn them, we take birth again to begin from where we left off.  This is the natural process of evolution.

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Source: An article by Swami Nikhilananda, Chinmaya Mission.
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